Stress in the Midst of Rest

In the midst of this mandated rest do you find yourself feeling stressed at all?

Perhaps you feel stress about the virus, not being able to go and do as you would like, finances, moving forward, being restless…

After about a week of not sleeping well, I decided it was time to take a look at my own stress. And I didn’t like what I found. See, I’m one of those people that my brain tries to hide the stress from me so I actually don’t “feel” it until I get physical symptoms – like not being able to sleep.

I have not allowed myself a period of rest. I have continued to push and do and be all the things when perhaps God was calling me to rest too. To take advantage of this mandated rest period – 40 days to be exact (Check out all the events in the Bible that were 40 days long!)

So, why do we find ourselves stressed when we are called (or mandated) to rest?

My first thought is guilt. I feel guilty when I’m resting. This person and that person are working and I should be too. Who am I to rest when they are giving it their all?

Another idea is perhaps lack of control. When I can’t control outward circumstances I tend to up my control on internal circumstances. Meaning, I try to control the things I can – and like a tyrant sometimes too. :/ And that often leads to massive to-do lists (Mine today had 29 things on it. Sigh.). And overworking too, so I don’t have to think about what I can’t control.

Isaiah 28:12 says, “God has told his people, “Here is a place of rest; let the weary rest here. This is a place of quiet rest.” But they would not listen.” (NLT)

Yeah. That’s me. Sigh again.

Jesus says, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.” (Matthew 11:28 NLT)

As I sit and type this it sounds so refreshing in my exhausted state. I am going to seek to rest in the shadow of the Almighty. Wanna join me?

Need a Bit of Accountability?!?!

Sometimes, when life throws curve balls like…

  • a pandemic
  • getting sick
  • moving
  • loss of a job or getting a job…

it can be really hard to stay on track. Staying on track with our spiritual, mental, and physical health.

And yet, God provides for us each and every day exactly what we need to stay in communion with Him and remain healthy. So, why do so many of us struggle?!?! Including myself!

Well, we let ourselves, others, or circumstances get in the way. We put our priorities in places and perhaps they should be elsewhere. So, what are we to do?

Well, first of all, we seek the Father and His pleasing and perfect will. We ask, seek, and knock and keep asking, seeking, and knocking until He lays out His perfect plan for us. And then, perhaps, we get some earthly accountability. Somebody to help us stay on track and help us keep our focus on Christ – even in the midst of the curve balls of life.

I created a group to help us do just that. I am beginning a weekly coaching program that requires NO COMMITMENT!  Yup, that’s right.  You choose week by week if you want to join us!  It’s an accountability group to help us Stay Sane and Stay Fit!  That’s spiritually, mentally, & physically fit.  

And it’s super AFFORDABLE!  First of all, your first week is free!  Then after that it’s only $25 per week!  And if you choose to sign up for four weeks at a time then it’s only $20 per week!  You can skip weeks or join or cancel anytime!
To learn more CLICK HERE

Or you can email me at needahealthcoach@gmail.com to learn more!

Healthy Relationships

Relationships are hard.

We are human. And humans are not perfect.

We say things we shouldn’t, do things that make others mad, and are forgetful. We hurt those closest to us. Sometimes without even being aware.

So, how do we have close relationships – whether that’s with friends, family, or our spouse – and keep them healthy?

Well, I think there are a zillion self help books out there about relationships. But let’s take a look at the Bible to see what God says about it.

Colossians 3:13 says, “Be tolerant with one another and forgive one another whenever any of you has a complaint against someone else. You must forgive one another just as the Lord has forgiven you.” (GNT)

Ephesians 4:2 says, “Be completely humble and gentle, be patient, bearing with one another in love.” (NIV)

Colossians 3:12 says, “Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience.” (NIV)

John 13:34 says, “A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another.” (NIV)

I think we could find hundreds of verses that instruct us on how to be in relationship with others. But, what does all this mean? How can we put this into practical terms?

Well, let’s look at a few examples:

Forgive. When a friend forgets your birthday. When your spouse comes home late and forgot to call. When your kid gets on your ever-lovin’ last nerve. Forgive.

Be patient. When your friend is late for a lunch date. When your husband isn’t giving you the attention you desire. When your kids just can’t get that homework.

Be compassionate. When your friend has had a hard day. When your husband is sick. When your kid had their heart broken.

Love. When your friend is lonely. When your husband craves your attention. When your kid is growing so fast.

Obviously, these are only a few examples of how we can help our relationships be healthier. What would you add to this list?

Loving Yourself in the Midst of Stress

Stress comes and stress goes.

How we handle it and what we do with it greatly affects our physical, mental, and spiritual health. There has been much research on what happens to our bodies under stress. Many studies confirm what I found to be true for myself: When we don’t deal with stress in a healthy way and stuff it down our bodies hold on to it until we end up having physical symptoms. That could be something like chronic illnesses, pain, even diseases like cancer, digestive diseases, fibromyalgia, etc.

So, what can you do to help love yourself in the midst of stress (a.k.a – take care of yourself)? Here’s my top 5 suggestions:

  1. Pray – Draw close to God and He will draw close to you. When you take time out of your day in quietness with God you will automatically turn down the stress response. Plus, God can help if you ask Him too!
  2. Forgive – Often when we’re stressed we want to blame others. I invite for you to offer forgiveness in a time when anger or frustration would normally come out instead.
  3. Take time for yourself – Maybe even just a few minutes here or there breathing, praying, or whatever to help calm the central nervous system. Fill your cup!
  4. Sleep and exercise – Yes, this is taking care of yourself! Getting enough sleep and exercise is super important when we’re stressed. When we’re tired and our bodies don’t get the movement they crave we are more likely to be grouchy and snap.
  5. Relax with family or friends – Research shows that spending time with those we love helps relieve stress. Laughter is the best medicine!

What is your go-to when you are stressed? How do you manage it?

What Are You Allowing in Your Mind?


Philippians 4:8

“Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable- if anything is excellent or praiseworthy- think about such things.”


Our minds are more powerful than we might realize.

Did you know that people have actually lost weight by simply seeing themselves exercise in their mind! Hear me again: they didn’t actually do any exercise. They simply visualized themselves doing the exercise. AND. They. Lost. Weight.

What?!?!

Yup. It’s true. Our minds are powerful. And if we fill it with negativity like:

  • I’m not good enough
  • I’ll never fit in
  • I don’t have a purpose
  • The nightly news
  • Fear and dread
  • Constant arguing

Then we will have that in our lives abundantly.

On the other hand, if we fill our minds with positivity like:

  • God loves me
  • I have a purpose (even if I’m not totally sure what it is)
  • I am loved
  • UP television
  • Peace and calm
  • Fun times with friends and family

Then we will have that in our lives abundantly.

God gives us freedom to think about whatever we want. But Satan also has the ability to influence our thoughts.


2 Corinthians 10:5 says,

“Take captive every thought and make it give up and obey Christ.”


So, how do we know of what we’re thinking is from God or not. Well, we can test it.

Here are a few litmus tests for each thought:

  • Does it contradict the Bible?
  • Does it help me show love to others?
  • Will this further the kingdom of God?
  • Do I have the mind of Christ?
  • How is this thought offering grace to others?

I only know these things because I have allowed so many thoughts in the past turn to actions that, I realized later, were not of God. And that led to some very painful events for me. (Saying sorry is really hard.)


2 Timothy 1:7 says,

For God has not given us a spirit of fear, but of power, love, and a sound mind.”


He gives us tools to use our mind wisely and powerfully! What we put in matters. From out of the overflow of the heart and mind the mouth speaks.

What are you allowing in your mind?

#real life

Let’s get real here friends.

Life is hard. Being a woman is hard. Parenting is hard. Work is hard. Doing the right thing is hard.

And sometimes we do it well. And sometimes we don’t.

You know, in easy times and in tough times most of us know at least one thing to do to help ourselves or our situation. We know at least one thing to help us lose weight. We know at least one thing to raise our kids to be happy and healthy. We know at least one thing to help our relationships.

YET, sometimes we do those things and sometimes we don’t.

Why? Why do we choose to do things that we know probably won’t help and might even hurt the situation or circumstance.

Because we’re tired. We’re overwhelmed. We don’t have any willpower left.

Plus, pride, selfishness, the ways of the world, and evil can get in the way too.

And choosing the quick or easy thing doesn’t usually give us the results we’re looking for. In our culture of instant gratification hard work doesn’t seem very enticing.

So, what are we to do to help ourselves get through- especially during the really tough times? Here’s my top three ways:

1. Pray

Turn your eyes to Jesus. Tell him your hurts, your struggles, your pain. He knows what you’re going through, and he knows how it feels.


Matthew 7:7

“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.”


And God wants us to co continually ask, seek, and knock. It’s not a one time and voila. Draw close to God in persistent prayer and He will draw near to you.

2. Read and Meditate on Scripture

The Bible has answers for all life questions and struggles. It may not be in the form of a neon blinking sign (which I prefer! Ha!). But, as we read more of God’s word we get to know Him more, and He then reveals more of his plan.

Study scripture (and believe it) for tips on physical, emotional, and spiritual health. It’s the greatest guidebook ever!


John 11:40

“Then Jesus said, ‘Did I not tell you that if you believe, you will see the glory of God?'”


3. Get an Accountability Partner

Having someone like a friend, coach, or pastor to help hold you accountable can be life changing. They can help you step towards your goals in a way you can’t do by yourself.

Again, most of us know what to do. We just have a hard time following through. Having an accountability partner can be the missing piece- especially if we’ve tried again and again without success.


Ecclesiastes 4:9-10

“Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor. If either of them falls down, one can help the other one up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up.”


Which one of these do you need more of in your life? How can you implement more of that starting today?

Set yourself up for success and better ability to handle the storms of life with these three tips.

If you need someone to be your accountability partner, I would be honored to have the opportunity to walk alongside you in life.

Click here to schedule a time to chat with me for free to see if we might be a good team.

Are you a perfectionist like me?

Hi. My name is Carrie. And I am a recovering perfectionist.

I like things neat, tidy, my way, and perfect. And I prefer the people around me to be too.

However, that’s not real life.

Real life is messy, imperfect, unpredictable, painful, and way out of my control. (God is showing me this pretty intensely in the current season of my life. Sigh.)

I feel like part of being a perfectionist is feeling in control. And when life spirals out of control then we freak out, stress out, and our anxiety hits the roof (and perhaps blows it to smithereens).

Control is really an illusion. There are certain things in life that we can control such as:

  • What we eat
  • What we wear
  • What we talk about
  • What we think about
  • Our happiness
  • Who we hang out with
  • How seriously we take life
  • What we believe
  • Our priorities
  • How kind we are

Other than that, God has the ultimate say on what goes on in this crazy world of ours. We can’t control other people. We can’t control situations. We can’t control hate.

So, if you’re a perfectionist – recovering or not- like me, I invite for you to take a step back. Allow God to do His thing (He’s actually really good at it) and give Him control over all things. All things.

All things.

Proverbs 19:21

Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.

To Love or Not to Love

Are you willing to potentially have a broken heart? Are you willing to be vulnerable? Are you willing to put your self on the line?

I heard this quote from a Brene Brown book. It struck me then and even more now.

“To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything and your heart will be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping it intact you must give it to no one, not even an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements. Lock it up safe in the casket or coffin of your selfishness. But in that casket, safe, dark, motionless, airless, it will change. It will not be broken; it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable. To love is to be vulnerable.”

-C.S. Lewis

Sometimes in life we put ourselves out there. We risk being seen. We allow ourselves, our thoughts, our visions, our goals, our lives to be vulnerable. We risk it all.

For love.

This quote struck me intensely today because my heart is breaking over a situation. But this quote reminds me that giving love (a.k.a. time, energy, feeling, passion…) is taking a risk. Perhaps the biggest risk in life.

But if we choose to lock ourselves away, harden our hearts, and allow no one in then we’ll never experience what God intended for us. We might be stifling the greatest gift God has for our lives. And let me tell you I have hardened my heart before and it’s not a fun place to be.

Jesus tells us in Matthew 22:37-39:

Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: Love your neighbor as yourself.

So, the question, “To love or not to love?” has an answer. Right here. We are told to love God and love people. All people.

Is your heart breaking today? Perhaps, you too have allowed yourself to love and you’ve been hurt in the process. Take heart my friend.

God is with us, and He is for us! There is nothing in this world that can separate us from His love. That doesn’t mean that life won’t hurt. God is very clear that we will have trouble in this world. But take heart, “He has overcome the world.”

Isaiah 26:3

You will keep in perfect peace those whose minds are steadfast because they trust in you.

How Effectively Do You Use Time?

Our health is directly related to how we deal with stress. And time is one of those stresses that affects all of us. How effectively do you use your time? I know I am not always the best manager of my time.

So, I’ve been reading this book called The Deborah Anointing, by Michelle McClain-Walters (she also wrote The Anna Anointing and The Esther Anointing). In it she says,

“The quality of your life is determined by how effectively you use time.”

Notice she says, “time,” not “your time,” Hmmmm….

We feel most stressed when our calendars are so full and we feel like we have to get it all done NOW! So, how can we practically understand time and manage it better?

Ecclesiastes 3:1

There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.

Michelle goes on to describe four spiritual seasons of time in our lives. We experience:

Spiritual winter – a time of death to self

Spiritual spring – a time to embrace the call

Spiritual summer – a time of revelation

Spiritual fall – a time of harvest and fulfillment

In the midst of our busy schedules it’s important to keep Christ as our focus. It is sooooooo easy to allow ourselves to focus on things of this world – money, status, reputations, ourselves… (God has been working on my heart on this very thing lately. Sigh.)

Our life here on earth was meant as a preparation period for our eternity. God created each of us perfectly and for His purposes. If what we’re doing isn’t glorifying God in some way, we might need to reconsider if we need that thing. What spiritual season are you currently in? And how can you honor and accept where you are?

Let’s look at 5 ways we can practically keep our focus on God and use our time wisely no matter what spiritual season you might be in.

1.Adequate time with God daily

This is the most important part of our day. Think about this: You have about 8-10 hours of time during the day that are most likely dedicated to someone else – work, kids, whatever. That leaves you with 14-16 hours of time for yourself. Hopefully about 8 of those hours are sleeping. And that gives you 6-8 hours to do whatever else you desire. What are you doing with that time? Cooking and eating, exercising, playing, chores… What can you do so that time with God is your number one, non-negotiable priority?

2. Make a list of our top 5 priorities

I encourage you to take a moment and write down the top 5 priorities in your life. These are the MOST important things. This list will help you prioritize what you say yes or no to. Then use this list. Don’t just make it and put it aside. Allow it to help you make decisions.

3. Take time to breathe

You might be thinking, Carrie, I breathe all day long. I know, I know. But, I’m talking about time to focus on your breath. Every time you breathe in oxygen God is breathing into you His breath of life. Take time for 10 deep, focused breaths a day (at least) and watch your stress melt away. There are many different breathing techniques for different things. If you need help with this please let me know! I’m happy to give you more details, information, or tips.

4. Say no

This might be one of the hardest things for us. Saying no – especially when they are good things! But, it also might be what needs to happen to clear some things out of your calendar to make room for your top 5 priorities. I invite for you to inquire of God first to see if it’s something He wants you to do or not. Is there anything you can say no to today? And I might add – that if you have kids show them how to say no to things too. You will help set them up for success in so many ways.

5. Make a plan and be flexible

It’s important to not be willy-nilly all the time or just live by the seat of our pants. We do need a plan. But it’s also important to be flexible with that plan. Life is uncertain and when we hold on to our plans like a tight fist then we are only causing more strain and stress on ourselves. (Take a moment and make a tight fist. See how that would feel in your entire body to carry that around all day every day.) Make a plan, and allow God to infuse, change, and direct you – even when His way seems way out of the way. His plans are always good!

So, what is one thing you can do today to be a better manager of time?